Crushed Ego and Broken Contracts

In my 3DWiredSafety blog, I wrote about Internet Safety in the light of an something I had heard close to 50 years ago.

He who knows not and knows not that he knows not is a fool.
Avoid him.
He who knows not and knows that he knows not is a student.
Teach him.
He who knows and knows not that he knows is asleep.
Wake him.
He who knows and knows that he knows is a wise man.
Follow him.

That not exactly the way I heard it and the story of behind my exposure to it is a powerful testimony to the impact a teacher can have on a student. My ninth grade English teacher defined a fool as one who knows not and knows not that he knows not.

English with Lyla Filippe was a mixed bag. She was stately and proper, but with a quick wit and sense of humor that could be hilarious, challenging, and humiliating all at the same time.

As a student, I tended to be a bit on the challenging side. I challenged authority, though not in a belligerent way. It would usually be with humor, quips, jokes, pranks, or simply playing devil's advocate.

While I hated diagramming sentences, I loved it when she read daily from South Pacific. When it came to the Canterbury Tales, I read them with difficulty, but tolerated them. If we were diagramming sentences and covering Chaucer in the same day, it bothered me. I could not see how either would help me in the future. I was always the one who queried, "How will this help me when I'm an adult?" and the standard answer of "trust me it will" did little satisfy me. It set the stage for trouble.

John Mahoney sat next to me in class. I have a feeling that he and I were on the same wavelength when it came to this class, though he was more of an English student than I. We both liked and respected Lyla, as we would refer to her out of class, but we both had that impish streak. It was he who put forth the spark that lit a fire under me.

One day while discussing Chaucer, she mentioned that little was known about his early life. I think something in that discussion is what led Mahoney to quip that Chaucer didn't really write the Canterbury Tales and that it was actually Chaucer's grandfather. I picked up on that idea and it became a running thread in our discussions over the next few days. At first Lyla was slightly amused, but as we pressed the point, her patience waned. One day she said, "That's enough. If you can even find anything about Chaucer's grandfather, I'll give you an A."

The gauntlet was thrown down and I picked it up. Over the next week, I scoured the school library and the Vineland public library. Unfortunately, nothing was available. Undaunted, somehow I convinced my parents to let me take the bus to New York and try the NY Public Library. It was there I hit the jackpot. I was able to come back with about three pages of written material on Chaucer's grandfather.

I presented my findings to an amazed and amused class and teacher. It was about two-thirds of the way through the marking period and at that point I had a B average. Resting on my laurels and my upcoming A, I relaxed and skimmed by the rest of the marking period.

On the day before report cards, Lyla would call us up to the desk one at a time to go over our grades. When my time came, I was shocked when she informed me that I had a C-. I was crushed!

Some might say I should have seen it coming, but deals such as mine for a grade were not uncommon. In fact, Chick Cowell, the gym teacher and one of my favorite teachers, would often present physical challenges in return for marking period grades.

Reminding her of our deal, she looked at me and said, "Who do you think I am, Chick Cowell?" I'm not sure which hurt more, her lack of respect of Chick Cowell or the fact that went back on her word. In any case, I simply said bitterly, "No, you are NOT Chick Cowell" and sulked back to my seat.

Neither one of us said anything more about it. I suspect and hope she had no idea how deeply she had hurt me and how much has taken place in that instant. Looking back, I can't hold that against her. She was otherwise even handed and a great teacher. Much of what I learned in her class, but positive and negative, carried over into my 35 years of teaching.  Along with the scar of that day came a valuable lesson that I have applied in adult life. It can be summed up in four words...

GET IT IN WRITING!