Thursday, August 29, 2013

Chatting with Dish

I'm on the board of our condo association. Two of us are looking into the possibilities of changing our rules to allow for more satellite dishes than are now permitted.  Having spent quite a bit of time researching the FCC regulations and other issues, all we needed to do to finish our report was to find out more about installers and the specifics of installations. 

Unfortunately, talking to a real person about this issue has, to this point been impossible. Numerous phone calls and visits to dealers who sell Dish or DTV, have proven fruitless.  Today, I went to the dish site and used the Chat feature to talk with Benjamin, who assured me he was a real person. I went it the conversation with little or no expectations of getting my questions answered. The conversation completely lived up to my expectations and I offer to you my chat session, in its entirety, for your consideration.

Benjamin (ID: M9H) (Listening)
Benjamin (ID: M9H): Hi, my name is Benjamin (ID: M9H). How may I help you?
Art : I am a board member of our condo association.  We are considering allowing for dish installations, but need answers to questions about installers and  installations.  Is there a number I can call.  I have had no luck speaking to a human.
Benjamin (ID: M9H): Are you chatting to set-up satellite TV today?
Art : No... I need answers in order to change our policy and rules
Benjamin (ID: M9H): You're chatting directly to Dish sales department. My name is Benjamin and I'm a real person that you chatting with.
Art : Then it would be nice if I could get my questions answered
Benjamin (ID: M9H): Sure, how can I be help with your concerns today, Art?
Art : Have you read the part about me being a board member and asking about installers and installations?
 Benjamin (ID: M9H): Thank you for having interest about our services that we offer. What are your concerns regarding our installation and installers?
Art : I would like to know who does the installations in our area.  Our zip code is 03077
Benjamin (ID: M9H): For our installation, we do give free installation and since that you're residing on a condo you need to have a land lord's permission a verbal agreement or a written permission will do.
Benjamin (ID: M9H): We can install our dishes on a tripod mount set up or a pole mount set up as well.
Art : I understand that, but quality of installation is our primary concern and we need to know WHO is doing the installations in our area.
Benjamin (ID: M9H): We do give you guys the 100% world class professional installation to give you guys the 100% optimal reception. We do send our highly trained Dish Network technician to do the installation for you.
Benjamin (ID: M9H): By the way, who is your current provider? Is it cable or other satellite provider?
Art : I represent 80 home owners in a condo association who only has cable now.  I need to know WHO installs in our area.  WHO are your highly trained techs?  Do the work exclusively for DISH?
Benjamin (ID: M9H): Yes, you're chatting directly to our online sales department of Dish.
Benjamin (ID: M9H): I apologize, I don't have the exact names for our installers. Once we finalize and generate an account number automatically it will be assigned to the first available technician to do the installation.
Art : But are they YOUR techs exclusively or are they contractors who also do other things for other companies?
Benjamin (ID: M9H): We do have direct technicians and we do have local contractors as well which are highly trained by Dish Network to give you guys the 100% customer service in terms of installation.
Art : We need to speak to someone about the specifics of installations were we are going to allow them.  Is it possible to have someone come out to look at a typical installation location and talk to me about it?
Benjamin (ID: M9H): For the condo/apartment installation, we are only allowed to set up dishes on a patio, balcony, wall where we can do the wall mount set up and any areas where tenants are allowed to use.
Benjamin (ID: M9H): Art, for me to check services in your area and locals are exactly coming from. Can I have the address please?
Art : Address removed for privacy
 Benjamin (ID: M9H): Your locals will be coming out of Boston, MA. You will have (ABC, CBS, NBC, and FOX) and they are available on both standard and high definition format.
Art : Do you know what the Turing test is?
 Benjamin (ID: M9H): Just to verify, what do you mean by "Turing test"?
Art : It is the test you are failing.  You might want to Google it.
Benjamin (ID: M9H): One moment as I double check it.
 Benjamin (ID: M9H): Thank you for waiting.
Benjamin (ID: M9H): Just to manage your expectation, you're chatting with a real person, Art.
Art : That's disappointing.  I could accept that I could talk to a computer for 30 minutes without getting a straight answer, but not a human.  Have you considered a career in politics?
Benjamin (ID: M9H): Art, regarding your concern about who will do the installation. We don't have the exact information about it. Once the work order is generated, it will be distributed to the first available installer's.
Art : Deja vu!  Benjamin, answer me this.  It is possible to get a yes or no answer to a question?
Benjamin (ID: M9H): As we have discussed earlier, the area that I mentioned where you guys can have install the dishes like patio, balcony and other area that tenants that are allowed to used  . We are able to set up dish as long we have a verbal permission or a hand written permission from the land lord.
Art : I'll take that as a, NO.  Thank you for your CPU time.
 Art : I have to go start dinner now.  It will take me about 45 minutes.  Can you hold on so we can finish our conversation?
Benjamin (ID: M9H): Yes.
Benjamin (ID: M9H): Art, I understand that you're about to take your dinner. If you just give me 5 more minutes of your time, we will be able to get you qualified for the best offer.
Benjamin (ID: M9H): I can see that there is an activity on your end. Please let me know once you're ready for us to proceed with your concern.
Benjamin (ID: M9H): Just to check, is everything okay on your end. Please let me know once you're back for us to proceed with your best deals and great saving offer.
Benjamin (ID: M9H): Are you still with me?
Benjamin (ID: M9H): We have noticed that you have been idle for more than 60 seconds.  If there is no response, your session will disconnect in two minutes. Thank you for choosing DISH Network.
Benjamin (ID: M9H): Due to no response I will now end this chat session. Please feel free to log in again for further assistance. Thank you for chatting on, have a great day.
Benjamin (ID: M9H) has disconnected.